💯 How good of a trauma-informed coach are you?
Here's a refined and structured self-reflection questionnaire based directly on the six core rubric categories from the Tim Fletcher rubric:
🌱 1. Self-Awareness
Humility, autonomy, identity, boundaries, recognizing patterns/codependency
- When do you notice yourself acting from old patterns (e.g., people-pleasing, avoidance, control)?
- How easily can you name your needs or emotions in the moment?
- How aware are you of your personal triggers in professional settings?
- How do you navigate moments when your boundaries feel tested?
- Can you recognize when you're being overly self-critical or overly identified with a part of you?
⚖️ 2. Personal Integrity
Accountability, non-maleficence, responsibility, owning your impact
- When you make a mistake or hurt someone, how do you typically respond — internally and externally?
- Can you name a time when you took ownership of something difficult, without collapsing into shame or blame?
- How do you hold the balance between being gentle with yourself and staying accountable?
- Are there areas where you struggle to speak up, fearing conflict or rejection?
- How do you handle it when someone offers you critical feedback?
🤝 3. Relational Effectiveness
Conflict resolution, communication, boundaries in relationships
- How do you tend to handle conflict or disagreement — do you confront, avoid, fawn, freeze?
- How skilled are you at giving and receiving feedback in emotionally charged situations?
- Do you ever lose your sense of center when others are dysregulated, angry, or withdrawn?
- Can you hold space for another person’s emotional experience without feeling responsible for fixing it?
- Do you tend to overextend in relationships? How do you repair or recalibrate?
🔄 4. Leading Self
Self-regulation, embodiment, consistency, growth integration
- What do you do to prepare your nervous system before a session or group?
- Can you tell when you're out of your window of tolerance? What helps you return to it?
- Do you consistently apply the tools and values you teach others in your personal life?
- How do you care for yourself after emotionally intense sessions or situations?
- Are there parts of your healing work that you intellectualize but find hard to live?
🌟 5. Leading Others
Supporting others’ growth, modeling boundaries, being a safe presence
- How do you create safety and trust in the spaces you lead?
- Do you model healthy boundaries, repair, and vulnerability when appropriate?
- How do you handle it when someone in a group becomes disruptive or emotionally flooded?
- Have you ever mentored or supported someone through a stuck point? What was your role?
- What do you want people to feel after being in space with you?
📈 6. Leading for Results
Purpose, decision-making, alignment with mission/values, initiative
- What impact do you most want to make — and are your actions aligned with that vision?
- How do you make decisions when facing uncertainty or competing needs (e.g., self vs. others)?
- Do you track and reflect on the outcomes of your coaching or facilitation?
- Are you able to course-correct when something you’re doing isn’t having the impact you intended?
- How do you measure success in your work — internally and externally?
Here's also a Trauma-Informed Coaching Checklist designed especially for the work of a professional who is deeply committed to being present, respectful, and effective in supporting others with complex trauma, ADHD, autism, and emotional struggles.
✅ TRAUMA-INFORMED COACHING CHECKLIST
🧠 KNOWLEDGE & UNDERSTANDING
- I understand the neurobiology of trauma (fight/flight/freeze/fawn, dysregulation, emotional flashbacks).
- I recognize how early attachment wounds shape self-worth, boundaries, and regulation.
- I am aware of how systems of oppression (ableism, racism, poverty, etc.) impact trauma and healing.
- I respect the nonlinear nature of trauma recovery (progress is not always visible or fast).
- I have basic familiarity with somatic and parts-based models (e.g., IFS, Polyvagal Theory, Somatic Experiencing).
🌿 SAFETY & ATTUNEMENT
- I focus on creating emotional safety first, rather than pushing for insight or change.
- I check in gently about my client’s nervous system state or emotional window during sessions.
- I track body language, tone, and energy shifts, and slow down or pause when needed.
- I regularly ask for feedback about how the space feels — safe, overwhelming, boring, etc.
- I never force or pressure — I invite, offer, and wait for consent at every step.
💛 RELATIONSHIP & PRESENCE
- I show up reliably, consistently, and with care, even when my client struggles.
- I stay regulated and grounded, especially when my client is overwhelmed or dissociating.
- I hold loving boundaries, neither merging nor abandoning my client emotionally.
- I model nonjudgmental presence and curiosity, even when the client is stuck, angry, or ashamed.
- I remember that the relationship itself is the medicine — I prioritize connection over technique.
🧰 TOOLS & TECHNIQUES
- I teach or co-create simple regulation tools (e.g., orienting, breath, safe anchors).
- I support parts work gently when helpful, without overwhelming or over-pathologizing.
- I know when to titrate or slow down, especially when strong emotions or memories arise.
- I respect and validate freeze, shutdown, or avoidance as trauma responses — not laziness or resistance.
- I help the client build capacity over time, not just insight.
🪞 SELF-AWARENESS & ETHICS
- I monitor my own nervous system state and projections during sessions.
- I take time for regular reflection, peer supervision, or support when I feel stuck or triggered.
- I know the limits of my role and refer out when clinical intervention is needed.
- I hold space for my client’s pace, truth, and contradictions, even when uncomfortable.
- I don’t try to “fix” the client — I witness, invite, guide, and empower.
✨ BONUS: CREATIVE, ADAPTIVE, CLIENT-LED
- I adapt my style to the client’s neurotype, energy level, and preferences (e.g., visuals, silence, movement).
- I use metaphors, stories, or creative language to make emotional work more accessible.
- I co-create rituals, anchor points, or shared practices to support consistency and trust.
- I remain playful and humble, inviting joy and lightness when possible.
- I remind myself: My presence is more important than my performance.
How many of the above criteria you already meet? In which ones do you struggle or would like to get better at?